Joel hears the car and there's a leap of hope inside him, something he can't hide from the demon and suddenly in response to that hope he can hear echoing laughter. At first he thinks it's inside his head, but it isn't, this thing is using his body to laugh and it isn't Joel's laugh, it isn't close at all, it's as awful a sound as the voice that had come out of him. The door opens and Coop is there, but he can't get inside and Joel wants to cry because this is his fault. It's so stupid of him. He had asked Coop for help and he hadn't once considered that something like this might happen, something might occur at the house where Coop wouldn't be able to come inside unless invited. It will be the same for Les and Nerium when they arrive, he realizes and he knows it isn't the end of the world, a few seconds won't make or break this situation, but he still feels so stupid. So distracted. So unprepared. He had spent so much time trying to convince himself and Spencer that nothing bad was going to happen that even his preparations hadn't been good enough.
His broken hand sweeps up and off the floor, knocking Spencer's grip loose with ease and Joel knows what's going to happen before it does. It's exactly as he's been thinking since discovering the demon in one of his books; the power he used on Mark and Eli, the one that had knocked them both away, the ability to hurt them without even laying a hand on them, it's all from the demon. He has one wild moment where he feels like laughing because he's wondering what else he can do that isn't really his. The book had said the demon would block some powers while feeding others into the host and Joel wonders if everything he can do, all the bad and all the good, comes from this thing inside him. It's not possible, he knows it isn't, but everything in this moment feels so terrible that he can't help but wonder all the same. Maybe if he doesn't die he'll just be a regular man, maybe he won't be able to do anything. Maybe he won't be able to protect Spencer anymore.
All thoughts of his powers disappear, though, when the demon uses a wall of invisible energy to throw Spencer back and Joel screams inside. It doesn't seem to be able to really touch Spencer, but there's nothing at all preventing it from using this power on him and Joel struggles wildly for a moment to regain control even though he knows it's hopeless. At the same time that the demon all but flings Spencer off his body, Joel is jerked back suddenly, yanked into a sitting position and he goes sliding backward across the floor, as far away from Spencer and the front door as he can get. He can see Coop just outside the door, he can see their only hope of beating this thing completely, but he can't do anything to get him inside. Trying to speak only serves to bring a fresh wave of laughter pouring out of the demon as it forces Joel's body to his feet and for the first time Joel doesn't feel the pain. All he can think of is Spencer. All he can do is hope that Spencer is okay, that he wasn't injured, that he'll be able to invite Coop inside.
It's a strange feeling, he realizes as he gets to his feet. It's like being a prisoner in his body, it's like being invaded and he knows if he recovers from this, he'll never be able to explain it to anyone who hasn't experienced and for that he'll be grateful. No one should know what it feels like to be trapped and out of control of their own body. It's the one thing Joel has been able to rely on, but now he's lost. Now he's at the mercy of others and he knows both Spencer and Coop will do everything in their power to make sure he survives this, but to be unable to help makes him feel so small and angry and lost. It makes him feel as if he's already lost a chunk of who he is.
And it's stranger still to realize his feet have left the ground. That his toes are just barely skimming the surface of the floor as the demon drags his body right up to the door where Coop stands. He's ashamed, he realizes. There's a deep sense of shame as he looks out at Coop, knowing his eyes are black like they had been the night of Coop's party. Knowing his friend must be realizing where that power came from, that the demon has been here with Joel all along. That maybe it's just a part of him. Maybe he's always been this way.
He wants to say he's sorry, but when his mouth opens, it's another string of Latin. It's just one more thing he doesn't understand. The demon can speak English, it's done so several times and Joel has to wonder if it's just for show. If this thing is doing it in an attempt to scare them both because the Latin is strange and unfamiliar and always associated with demons in movies.
But Spencer knows Latin. He can speak it better than Joel has ever been able to and for some reason he thinks that bothers the demon, too. Spencer knows it's only real trick besides violence and he feels like it's some kind of small victory for their side that he does.
"Ipse meam. Non potuerunt salvare eum." The words are directed at Coop, but Joel knows they're for Spencer as well. He wants to be able to turn around, to look for his husband and make sure he's okay, but he has no control. The time will come, he knows that, he's sure of that, and when it does he thinks he might be able to do it, but right now he's useless and he's helplessly. "Et disperdam eum. Et cessare faciam eum."
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His broken hand sweeps up and off the floor, knocking Spencer's grip loose with ease and Joel knows what's going to happen before it does. It's exactly as he's been thinking since discovering the demon in one of his books; the power he used on Mark and Eli, the one that had knocked them both away, the ability to hurt them without even laying a hand on them, it's all from the demon. He has one wild moment where he feels like laughing because he's wondering what else he can do that isn't really his. The book had said the demon would block some powers while feeding others into the host and Joel wonders if everything he can do, all the bad and all the good, comes from this thing inside him. It's not possible, he knows it isn't, but everything in this moment feels so terrible that he can't help but wonder all the same. Maybe if he doesn't die he'll just be a regular man, maybe he won't be able to do anything. Maybe he won't be able to protect Spencer anymore.
All thoughts of his powers disappear, though, when the demon uses a wall of invisible energy to throw Spencer back and Joel screams inside. It doesn't seem to be able to really touch Spencer, but there's nothing at all preventing it from using this power on him and Joel struggles wildly for a moment to regain control even though he knows it's hopeless. At the same time that the demon all but flings Spencer off his body, Joel is jerked back suddenly, yanked into a sitting position and he goes sliding backward across the floor, as far away from Spencer and the front door as he can get. He can see Coop just outside the door, he can see their only hope of beating this thing completely, but he can't do anything to get him inside. Trying to speak only serves to bring a fresh wave of laughter pouring out of the demon as it forces Joel's body to his feet and for the first time Joel doesn't feel the pain. All he can think of is Spencer. All he can do is hope that Spencer is okay, that he wasn't injured, that he'll be able to invite Coop inside.
It's a strange feeling, he realizes as he gets to his feet. It's like being a prisoner in his body, it's like being invaded and he knows if he recovers from this, he'll never be able to explain it to anyone who hasn't experienced and for that he'll be grateful. No one should know what it feels like to be trapped and out of control of their own body. It's the one thing Joel has been able to rely on, but now he's lost. Now he's at the mercy of others and he knows both Spencer and Coop will do everything in their power to make sure he survives this, but to be unable to help makes him feel so small and angry and lost. It makes him feel as if he's already lost a chunk of who he is.
And it's stranger still to realize his feet have left the ground. That his toes are just barely skimming the surface of the floor as the demon drags his body right up to the door where Coop stands. He's ashamed, he realizes. There's a deep sense of shame as he looks out at Coop, knowing his eyes are black like they had been the night of Coop's party. Knowing his friend must be realizing where that power came from, that the demon has been here with Joel all along. That maybe it's just a part of him. Maybe he's always been this way.
He wants to say he's sorry, but when his mouth opens, it's another string of Latin. It's just one more thing he doesn't understand. The demon can speak English, it's done so several times and Joel has to wonder if it's just for show. If this thing is doing it in an attempt to scare them both because the Latin is strange and unfamiliar and always associated with demons in movies.
But Spencer knows Latin. He can speak it better than Joel has ever been able to and for some reason he thinks that bothers the demon, too. Spencer knows it's only real trick besides violence and he feels like it's some kind of small victory for their side that he does.
"Ipse meam. Non potuerunt salvare eum." The words are directed at Coop, but Joel knows they're for Spencer as well. He wants to be able to turn around, to look for his husband and make sure he's okay, but he has no control. The time will come, he knows that, he's sure of that, and when it does he thinks he might be able to do it, but right now he's useless and he's helplessly. "Et disperdam eum. Et cessare faciam eum."