"As long as you're next to me, I'll already be home." He says it casually, with a smile because he's happy to see his husband laughing even though he feels another flash of unfounded guilt every time he sees Joel flinch from the pain, but by no means is Spencer flippant about that statement because it is an invariable truth. Joel could decide tomorrow that being in that house is too difficult for him, that he can't get past the memories of what the demon had done to him while he's there, that he thinks they should sell it, and Spencer knows he'd agree to it. That house has seen him through a lot of pain, he's lived in it since childhood, but Spencer would leave it in a heartbeat if it's what Joel wanted. He knows this isn't going to happen, that Joel wouldn't ask him to leave, and maybe that makes all of this easier to think but at the same time, Spencer would go anywhere for his husband. All Joel ever needs to do is ask.
It's the question about the fruit basket that ends up doing Spencer in, and he goes from a moderately amused smile to a full-blown grin as he huffs a laugh and gives Joel the most skeptical look he can manage right now with his eyes crinkling at the corners and his own shoulders shaking in time with Joel's. "A fruit basket, yes, nothing else screams banishment assistance appreciation quite like a fruit basket," he teases, playfully rolling his eyes even though even that serves to make his head smart but it's more than worth it because he wants to enjoy this moment. It's a bit morbid, a bit bizarre, but for at least a moment, Spencer is willing to let the pain medication coursing through Joel's system do the talking because it's better than focusing on the pain.
They're going to move past this, there's no question of it, they simply have to because they officially have a baby on the way. They're officially going to be fathers, they're going to share the responsibility of caring for another human life, and they won't be able to do that if they hold on too tightly to their pasts. Spencer knows it won't be easy, it never is. Over a decade later, Joel still feels that guilt for Amy's death and a day hasn't yet gone by that Spencer doesn't think about his mother or brother; but he'd meant what he said before, that he'd be there for Joel when he stumbles because he knows Joel will be there for him, too. Joel could have walked away for good after what had happened with Mark and if he'd been a different kind of man, he may very well have; but he isn't a different kind of man, he's Joel and that's why Spencer loves him so much. He's just Joel, and it's hardly an explanation but Spencer could talk for days about all the reasons he's so in love with this man, all the reasons he'd belonged to Joel from the very beginning and will belong to him until the very end.
The demon had been a roadblock, that's all. They're going to live a long and happy life together, Spencer believes that because Joel had said not too long ago that they'd be eighty and reminiscing about when their children were young, and he just can't let that image go. It's something that has to happen, something that will happen because he's brazen enough to say that he thinks they deserve it. They've been through too much together to lose everything sooner than later, and Spencer refuses to accept anything less than growing old with his husband.
"No more laughing," Spencer agrees, even as another chuckle escapes him, and rests his hand over Joel's arm. He can already envision how difficult it's going to be to keep Joel from trying to get to work on fixing the house back up as soon as he can, but Spencer fully intends to make sure Joel rests. The store can't stay closed for too long, but he thinks he can talk Charlotte into overseeing things there while Spencer works from home. She's as smart as her brother, though a thousand times more shameless, so Spencer isn't worried about how well she'll handle being there alone. He'll pay her--maybe won't tell Joel about that part and hope he doesn't look too closely at their next bank statement--but things like ordering inventory and balancing their ledger, he can do from home. He wants to be there for Joel but more than that, Spencer just doesn't like the idea of being too far away from him. He's never been particularly fond of that idea.
"Oh, believe me, I've already had a chat with your doctor about that. He and mine tried to bully me, you know, they tried to tell me I might exert myself into a worse condition but that hardly seems plausible. You'll be a model patient for me, won't you? In any case, I think they turned out to be very intimidated by my husbandly aggression." Spencer furrows his brow and frowns, making his best attempt at a stern face that he suspects doesn't look very stern at all.
"God, our child is going to think I'm a joke. What if I tell Dane to go to his room and he just laughs? Or what if Rose only comes to ask me things because she knows I'll always say yes?" Actually, Spencer can very easily picture Joel being the one who won't be able to resist any wide-eyed expression their child makes at him, and he rests his head back against their shared pillow and smiles softly. "The due date is July 7. She could be early or late, of course, but... That's not very far away at all, is it?"
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It's the question about the fruit basket that ends up doing Spencer in, and he goes from a moderately amused smile to a full-blown grin as he huffs a laugh and gives Joel the most skeptical look he can manage right now with his eyes crinkling at the corners and his own shoulders shaking in time with Joel's. "A fruit basket, yes, nothing else screams banishment assistance appreciation quite like a fruit basket," he teases, playfully rolling his eyes even though even that serves to make his head smart but it's more than worth it because he wants to enjoy this moment. It's a bit morbid, a bit bizarre, but for at least a moment, Spencer is willing to let the pain medication coursing through Joel's system do the talking because it's better than focusing on the pain.
They're going to move past this, there's no question of it, they simply have to because they officially have a baby on the way. They're officially going to be fathers, they're going to share the responsibility of caring for another human life, and they won't be able to do that if they hold on too tightly to their pasts. Spencer knows it won't be easy, it never is. Over a decade later, Joel still feels that guilt for Amy's death and a day hasn't yet gone by that Spencer doesn't think about his mother or brother; but he'd meant what he said before, that he'd be there for Joel when he stumbles because he knows Joel will be there for him, too. Joel could have walked away for good after what had happened with Mark and if he'd been a different kind of man, he may very well have; but he isn't a different kind of man, he's Joel and that's why Spencer loves him so much. He's just Joel, and it's hardly an explanation but Spencer could talk for days about all the reasons he's so in love with this man, all the reasons he'd belonged to Joel from the very beginning and will belong to him until the very end.
The demon had been a roadblock, that's all. They're going to live a long and happy life together, Spencer believes that because Joel had said not too long ago that they'd be eighty and reminiscing about when their children were young, and he just can't let that image go. It's something that has to happen, something that will happen because he's brazen enough to say that he thinks they deserve it. They've been through too much together to lose everything sooner than later, and Spencer refuses to accept anything less than growing old with his husband.
"No more laughing," Spencer agrees, even as another chuckle escapes him, and rests his hand over Joel's arm. He can already envision how difficult it's going to be to keep Joel from trying to get to work on fixing the house back up as soon as he can, but Spencer fully intends to make sure Joel rests. The store can't stay closed for too long, but he thinks he can talk Charlotte into overseeing things there while Spencer works from home. She's as smart as her brother, though a thousand times more shameless, so Spencer isn't worried about how well she'll handle being there alone. He'll pay her--maybe won't tell Joel about that part and hope he doesn't look too closely at their next bank statement--but things like ordering inventory and balancing their ledger, he can do from home. He wants to be there for Joel but more than that, Spencer just doesn't like the idea of being too far away from him. He's never been particularly fond of that idea.
"Oh, believe me, I've already had a chat with your doctor about that. He and mine tried to bully me, you know, they tried to tell me I might exert myself into a worse condition but that hardly seems plausible. You'll be a model patient for me, won't you? In any case, I think they turned out to be very intimidated by my husbandly aggression." Spencer furrows his brow and frowns, making his best attempt at a stern face that he suspects doesn't look very stern at all.
"God, our child is going to think I'm a joke. What if I tell Dane to go to his room and he just laughs? Or what if Rose only comes to ask me things because she knows I'll always say yes?" Actually, Spencer can very easily picture Joel being the one who won't be able to resist any wide-eyed expression their child makes at him, and he rests his head back against their shared pillow and smiles softly. "The due date is July 7. She could be early or late, of course, but... That's not very far away at all, is it?"