Spencer had been skeptical when Joel had insisted he go back to bed, having spent the majority of the night wide awake with his arm draped protectively over his husband's waist just to make sure that Joel would still be there in the morning. The past two years, he's woken up with a mild sense of disappointment that he'd opened his eyes at all, though he would never say he's wished himself dead since what had happened to his family. He'd have given his life for his brother or mother in an instant, that much is true, but things are different now. He has the sort of life he never could have even imagined for himself, he has a ring on his finger that represents a promise he would never have made to anyone but the man who's made every single day better, and he has a heart that seems to be ever growing with each passing moment as their baby's due date draws nearer and nearer.

It's because of all this that he's able to drift into a deeper sleep after being satisfied enough that Joel would be okay. There's a small voice in the back of his mind that chastises him for letting his husband out of his sight on this day for even a second but ultimately, Spencer believes it only speaks to how much Joel has helped him come to terms with the parts of his life that have only ever made him miserable. He'll cry later, he's sure of it, because the swell of emotion always manages to sneak up on him even though he tries to contain it but the thought of it doesn't make him want to spend the entirety of the afternoon buried under his sheets like it had the last couple years. This day is always going to mean something else to him, it's never just going to be his birthday ever again, but the difference is that on this third anniversary of his family's death, he's no longer alone.

It's the sound of an engine starting just outside the window that jolts him awake from a surprisingly pleasant dream, one that's already getting fuzzy but Spencer remembers that it'd had to do with watching Joel dip his toes into the ocean with their baby in his arms, and it spreads a warmth through Spencer's chest that overrides the panic of waking up alone as he sits up in bed to rub the sleep from his eyes. It barely takes him fifteen minutes to wash up and get dressed before wandering downstairs, his hair still damp from his shower, and he calls out Joel's name as he reaches the foot of the steps. The lack of an answer makes his chest tighten for just a second, and he forces himself to relax as he takes a breath and heads out toward the backyard. He's fairly certain that Joel wouldn't have actually left the house without telling him and even if that had been the case, Spencer's even more certain that it hadn't been his husband's car starting earlier.

When he finally reaches the yard, he's so caught up in thought that it doesn't even register that he's staring at an enormous bouncy castle with his husband grinning broadly over his shoulder at him. Spencer blinks, brow knitting as his mind tries desperately to catch up with what he's seeing, and it takes another few seconds for him to realize that he's smiling so widely that his cheeks already hurt. "You did it," he says with a short, huffed laugh as he takes another step toward Joel, hands held out in front of him as if he hasn't the slightest idea what to do with them or what to make of any of this, which is reasonably true. "God, you actually did it, this is... so odd but also so incredible." He reaches for his husband and pulls him in for a kiss, a long kiss that's passionate and tender and desperate all at once, then pulls just slightly away. "Thank you. We haven't even gone in yet but... just thank you."