He can see the wavering smile and Gabe tenses up a little, back going straight except for his head, which he drops down. Eye contact is hard when people are friendly but when they've gone cold like this it's just about impossible. He knows that tone of voice in his family very well; it's the one that indicates a transgression and coming discipline.

Yes. It should matter. Everything he knows tells him that it should matter because marriage is one man and one woman, being fruitful and multiplying. That's what God said.

But Spencer has been generous and he looks at Joel like...Like he can't even imagine ever looking at someone or being looked at the same way.

"I don't know. I'll go." His whole chest is heating up with something like panicky terror. He has to go. "I'm sorry. Good bye."