There's really nothing for Joel to add to that because it says everything and he takes his glass from Spencer, lightly touching the rims together. They make a soft, pleasing clink in the silence of the library and he lifts his glass to his lips, taking a sip of his drink. As always, it burns pleasantly in his throat and down into his chest, warming him through. Glancing down at the glass in his hand, he grins, tightening his grip on Spencer's hip before he tugs him a little closer. They are going to be the happiest family, he's already sure of it. He knows it won't always be easy, he knows there's bound to be complications and bumps in the road, he isn't naive enough to think there won't be difficult days or times when all he wants to do is sit down in a corner with his head in his hands, but he also truly believes that he and Spencer can do anything together. He truly believes he's found the best person in this world to raise a family with, the one who'll make him the happiest, the one who'll work with him, who'll support him, the one person he'll want to support in return. No one has ever understood him or responded to him the way Spencer has and he trusts it to extend to beyond just their relationship. He trusts it to come into play when it comes to their family, their baby, their possible future children. This is where he's meant to be, he has no doubt of that.
With a smile, he takes another sip of his whiskey and then looks at Spencer again. "You know, my favourite memory of the past two weeks is probably going to change regularly, but at this moment it's the memory of seeing your face when you took your first sip of whiskey in the palace library." Looking back at the time he'd spent thinking he was a prince, there really is a great number of good memories and he knows just how lucky they were that their experience hadn't been terrible of traumatic. There are a good number of moments for him to choose from as his favourite. The time they'd spent on the beach together, the way they had exchanged shells on Joel's birthday, the feel of Spencer's lips pressed to his again for what had, at the time, been the first time. But right now he's thinking of the face Spencer had made when trying whiskey, the way his nose had wrinkled, the shudder that had come through him and it makes him smile. A year ago Spencer had brought him into this very room to share a glass of whiskey and maybe it hadn't been quite a year to the day, it isn't an exact anniversary, but he likes the implication of it all the same. A year ago he'd come into this library to share a drink with a man he barely knew at all. And in another world, in another life, he'd brought Spencer into his own library to do the same.
It hadn't been entirely perfect, but for the most part Joel is doing his best not to think about the visitor he and Spencer had that night in the library. He hasn't seen Amy since the night of the cliff, seventeen years old, young and vibrant, and then suddenly just gone. She's still dead, he knows that. Nothing in this world or any other can bring her back without meddling in dark magic and dark forces, but seeing her alive and adult and happy has stirred something in him. Guilt, certainly. Guilt more than anything else. But he remembers how happy he'd been to see her, too, the easy friendship they'd shared, the way in which she had so easily approved of Spencer without saying a word. Amy had been a daredevil, she'd wanted to meddle in dangerous things, but she had been only a teenager and Joel thinks wanting to mess around in things that seem dangerous is likely a trait of many teenagers. She can't be blamed for curiosity. He has to wonder if the woman who had come into the library that night is how Amy would have really turned out. If she would have been as kind and accepting and smart as she'd appeared. He suspects she would have.
They haven't really talked about it because he hasn't been sure what to say and he thinks Spencer is giving him the time and space he needs to deal with whatever it is he needs to deal with. It's just one more thing he loves so desperately about this man in front of him; he understands what Joel needs and how to let him deal with his emotions, he knows when it's right to push him to talk and when it's better to let him come to things on his own, and Joel smiles again, then leans in and presses a soft, warm kiss against Spencer's mouth.
"I'll be happy for the rest of my life so long as I have you and our family," he says. "No matter what else happens, no matter what we face, I know we can do it together." And a year ago he never would have been so free with his trust, he never would have been able to just allow himself to believe something so completely, but it's easy with Spencer. He just trusts him and he has no doubt he always will.
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With a smile, he takes another sip of his whiskey and then looks at Spencer again. "You know, my favourite memory of the past two weeks is probably going to change regularly, but at this moment it's the memory of seeing your face when you took your first sip of whiskey in the palace library." Looking back at the time he'd spent thinking he was a prince, there really is a great number of good memories and he knows just how lucky they were that their experience hadn't been terrible of traumatic. There are a good number of moments for him to choose from as his favourite. The time they'd spent on the beach together, the way they had exchanged shells on Joel's birthday, the feel of Spencer's lips pressed to his again for what had, at the time, been the first time. But right now he's thinking of the face Spencer had made when trying whiskey, the way his nose had wrinkled, the shudder that had come through him and it makes him smile. A year ago Spencer had brought him into this very room to share a glass of whiskey and maybe it hadn't been quite a year to the day, it isn't an exact anniversary, but he likes the implication of it all the same. A year ago he'd come into this library to share a drink with a man he barely knew at all. And in another world, in another life, he'd brought Spencer into his own library to do the same.
It hadn't been entirely perfect, but for the most part Joel is doing his best not to think about the visitor he and Spencer had that night in the library. He hasn't seen Amy since the night of the cliff, seventeen years old, young and vibrant, and then suddenly just gone. She's still dead, he knows that. Nothing in this world or any other can bring her back without meddling in dark magic and dark forces, but seeing her alive and adult and happy has stirred something in him. Guilt, certainly. Guilt more than anything else. But he remembers how happy he'd been to see her, too, the easy friendship they'd shared, the way in which she had so easily approved of Spencer without saying a word. Amy had been a daredevil, she'd wanted to meddle in dangerous things, but she had been only a teenager and Joel thinks wanting to mess around in things that seem dangerous is likely a trait of many teenagers. She can't be blamed for curiosity. He has to wonder if the woman who had come into the library that night is how Amy would have really turned out. If she would have been as kind and accepting and smart as she'd appeared. He suspects she would have.
They haven't really talked about it because he hasn't been sure what to say and he thinks Spencer is giving him the time and space he needs to deal with whatever it is he needs to deal with. It's just one more thing he loves so desperately about this man in front of him; he understands what Joel needs and how to let him deal with his emotions, he knows when it's right to push him to talk and when it's better to let him come to things on his own, and Joel smiles again, then leans in and presses a soft, warm kiss against Spencer's mouth.
"I'll be happy for the rest of my life so long as I have you and our family," he says. "No matter what else happens, no matter what we face, I know we can do it together." And a year ago he never would have been so free with his trust, he never would have been able to just allow himself to believe something so completely, but it's easy with Spencer. He just trusts him and he has no doubt he always will.