Joel is a little afraid of seeing Erin like this, of having to answer questions. So far they've avoided talking much about magic, but if she's spent a lot of time in and around Siren Cove, he's been hoping she already knows that magic exists, that she lives in a world with witches and sirens, because he knows eventually they'll have to tell her. She's carrying a child for them and Joel wants to make every effort to be as honest with her as possible, but being a witch is something he's kept secret from everyone for such a long time that he hasn't been sure how to tell her. It's not the sort of thing Joel has been very good at, telling people what he can do, but now he doesn't have much of a choice.
And now it all looks sort of awful. He'd summoned a demon as a teenager and it had nearly destroyed his entire family's life at the time. Now it's put his family in danger again and he hates that this is how he's going to have to tell her, but it can't be avoided. He can't pretend nothing has happened, especially when he knows he isn't going to be let out of the hospital right away. Even if the doctor would agree to let him go, there's no missing the cast on his hand or the marks on his face. They've both been injured and she's going to expect an explanation.
"I'm afraid to tell her," he admits. He'd considered not saying anything, but Spencer will understand. It's likely Spencer feels the same way and Joel doesn't think they should have to keep it from each other. They're embarking on a huge life change and to have something like this thrown into the mix feels awful, like it's trying to take this happiness away from them. It can't, it won't change anything, but he's still afraid.
"We haven't told her what I am and it seems so stupid now," he says, shaking his head a little. "Like I should have told her right from the start so that she wouldn't be surprised, so she wouldn't have any reason to stop this." And she can't now or maybe she can, Joel isn't entirely sure. She's pregnant, certainly, but it's not impossible to change that. He thinks there are parts of the contract that make it so she can't do anything like that, that if she changes her mind about them there has to be mediation involved. Besides all that, Joel is certain she wouldn't do anything like that. He's sure that Erin isn't going to blame him for this or think there's something wrong with him because of what he can do.
But that fear won't leave. He finally has so many things he'd never even realized he wanted this badly and he's terrified that his stupid mistake from all those years ago really will take it all away.
"What if... I don't know, Spencer, what if she thinks there's something wrong with me?" he asks. "Not everyone in this town appreciates that there are witches and sirens wandering around everywhere." He's kept away from most of it just because he's been quiet and secretive, but now the possibility that someone very important might hate him just seems all too possible.
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And now it all looks sort of awful. He'd summoned a demon as a teenager and it had nearly destroyed his entire family's life at the time. Now it's put his family in danger again and he hates that this is how he's going to have to tell her, but it can't be avoided. He can't pretend nothing has happened, especially when he knows he isn't going to be let out of the hospital right away. Even if the doctor would agree to let him go, there's no missing the cast on his hand or the marks on his face. They've both been injured and she's going to expect an explanation.
"I'm afraid to tell her," he admits. He'd considered not saying anything, but Spencer will understand. It's likely Spencer feels the same way and Joel doesn't think they should have to keep it from each other. They're embarking on a huge life change and to have something like this thrown into the mix feels awful, like it's trying to take this happiness away from them. It can't, it won't change anything, but he's still afraid.
"We haven't told her what I am and it seems so stupid now," he says, shaking his head a little. "Like I should have told her right from the start so that she wouldn't be surprised, so she wouldn't have any reason to stop this." And she can't now or maybe she can, Joel isn't entirely sure. She's pregnant, certainly, but it's not impossible to change that. He thinks there are parts of the contract that make it so she can't do anything like that, that if she changes her mind about them there has to be mediation involved. Besides all that, Joel is certain she wouldn't do anything like that. He's sure that Erin isn't going to blame him for this or think there's something wrong with him because of what he can do.
But that fear won't leave. He finally has so many things he'd never even realized he wanted this badly and he's terrified that his stupid mistake from all those years ago really will take it all away.
"What if... I don't know, Spencer, what if she thinks there's something wrong with me?" he asks. "Not everyone in this town appreciates that there are witches and sirens wandering around everywhere." He's kept away from most of it just because he's been quiet and secretive, but now the possibility that someone very important might hate him just seems all too possible.