just_another | [closed - Caden

Spencer has been in the palace for four days now.

The ball is in nine days.

And Joel is no closer to having made a decision of what he wants to do. In nine days he'll be expected to choose a bride or his brother will and Joel has no idea what might happen. He's more confused and conflicted with every moment that passes because he thinks he knows what he truly wants. No, he knows what he truly wants, but he has no idea how he's going to be able to broach the matter with his parents. They want him to choose a princess, they want him to start a family, respectable and presentable and able to take over the thrones when and if necessary.

But the more time Joel spends with Spencer, the more he realizes what he wants is right there. All of it is within that man who cannot speak, who seems to be in pain every moment he's walking, a man who can't explain where he's come from or who he is, but none of that matters. Joel looks at him and he just knows. Their time together is spent mostly in silence, but Joel has never been much of a talker. Caden has always been able to put his thoughts into words better than he has and he's often relied on his brother to be able to understand what he's feeling.

This is all so new, but he still knows if there's anyone he can talk to about what he's feeling, it's Caden. Even when he can't explain what he's feeling, Caden has always been able to figure it out and after Joel leaves Spencer with a promise to see him in just a little while, he goes to find his brother.

Who is, of course, reading in the gardens.

As he approaches, Joel smiles despite himself. With everything going on, he hasn't been quite so prone to smiling lately, but its difficult not to, finding his brother in what must be the most familiar position he's ever seen him in.

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At the question Joel flushes so deeply it feels as if his face is on fire and he rubs his palm against his cheek as if he can just brush it away. Although he doubts Caden has missed that Joel hasn't really had all that many romantic encounters, he's also gone out of his way to avoid talking about the few he has had. It's just been easier that way and there really hasn't been anyone worth talking about since Amy anyway. They had broken off their engagement so long ago that Joel thinks it's likely embarrassing he still thinks of her at all.

"No," he says, although he suspects Caden already knows that to be the case. "I keep thinking maybe I should. There are these... these moments and I want to and it seems right, but I keep second guessing myself and then the moment passes without having done anything at all."

He pauses and swallows hard, his cheeks still red under his beard, and he looks off into the garden, back in the direction of the palace. "I was thinking perhaps at the ball. It would be rather romantic, wouldn't it? Maybe it's a little silly to be thinking of romance when I'm going to be thirty in less than a week, but I don't know that he's ever had something like that. I think maybe he deserves that."

Caden lets out a delighted laugh as Joel flushes so deeply. It's always been so easy to make his brother blush, and sometimes Caden just can't help himself. His smile softens into something fond as Joel speaks and he finds himself nodding along. They're both such utter romantics. Complete saps.

"That does sound quite romantic," Caden agrees. His first kiss with April had been on the beach. It had been quite romantic to him, just this perfect moment suspended in time. "You'll know when the moment is right. Just don't let it pass you by."

Joel already feels as if there's been countless right moments and he's already silently cursed himself for letting them pass by when he knows he shouldn't have. But fear is a powerful thing and even though he knows Caden has said it's clear Spencer returns his feelings, he can't quite convince himself of that.

But as he'd decided the day in the market, rejection is better than never knowing. It's better than waking up one day, ten years from now, and still feeling that pang of regret he knows will come with never having said a thing.

"This has been something of a strange week," he says after a moment. "And with my birthday party and the ball yet to come." He isn't looking forward to the party at all, knowing his mother is using it as preparation for the ball, knowing she's invited all his prospective brides.

"Never a dull moment," Caden tells him with a small smile. He reaches over and claps him on the back again, rubbing his hand back and forth. "It'll all work out, brother. I have faith."

He drops his hand and pulls his book into his lap, nodding to himself. Joel and Spencer have something truly special, and Caden just has to believe that they'll have a happy ending. "I'll do my best to run interference at your party. I know mother can be a little, well, we'll say overzealous."

"Enthusiastic?" Joel asks with a grin, because that's certainly the right word to describe their mother. She means well, though, he knows she does, and he can't find it in his heart to be truly annoyed, not when she had every reason to hand him off to anyone else when she had found him. She'd taken him instead, she'd raised him, loved him, done everything a mother should.

He knows he's lucky. He knows he could have been found by anyone, but this was the family he'd been brought into and he'll always be grateful for that.

"I may have asked Spencer to meet me in the library that evening," he admits. "I thought it'd be a nice vantage point to watch the fireworks you know she's going to inevitably arrange."

"Nothing but the best for my dear, sweet prince," Caden says in a spot on impersonation of their mother. She's a wonderful woman and mother, but sometimes she can be a little steeped in tradition. Caden is glad that he and Joel were always able to connect so well.

"Leaving me to all the noble wolves, huh?" Caden teases, knocking their shoulders together. "I hope you know that I'll consider covering for you all night as your birthday present."

If Joel is going to disappear from his own party, Caden will need to run interference so no one will go looking for him. It's not like he has any other plans for the evening, and this may even keep him entertained.

"Just don't tell anyone where I've gone, that's all I ask," Joel says with a laugh. Most of the time people are too busy interacting with each other and drinking wine to really notice whether he's there or not, but he's certain there will be a few people looking for him. There's one princess in particular who's been particularly vocal about her hopes that Joel will choose her and while she's very sweet, he couldn't imagine his life with her even before Spencer.

"No one else seems to want to spend any time in the library during a party, so I should have that working in my favour," he continues. "I can't imagine anyone will come looking for me there."

"I like to spend time in the library during parties, dear brother, since my beloved gardens are always overtaken by couples looking to steal kisses. Or more." He laughs softly and shrugs a bit. "But sure, I'll run interference. I'll talk to a few of your hopeful ladies as well."

[closed - Caden - April 21]

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