"You were still my prince," he counters, which is perhaps a silly thing to say but that doesn't make it any less true to him. No, the titles hadn't mattered and no, Spencer couldn't have cared less whether they'd stayed on land instead of venturing back to the water but at the end of all things, he'd just been happy to hvae the chance to be with Joel--again. Sometimes, the realization of just how in love with this man he is still hits him hard enough to stop him in his tracks. He'll be shelving new inventory or re-organizing whatever mess his husband has made in tracking down a book for his customer, and he'll simply forget what he's meant to be doing in favor of looking over his shoulder to set his eyes on his husband.
He can't believe how blind he'd been all these years, blind to how utterly beautiful the quiet bookshop owner he'd never said more than a few words to really is, how utterly kind and smart and gentle; but as he's told himself time and time again, they'd met when it was right. The impact of it, of having his life saved in the midst of a Hydra attack of all things, is something he couldn't forget even if he'd tried and everything else that had followed had led them here. Here, in the safest place he knows in spite of what he's seen and what's been done to him, Spencer has never been happier in his entire life.
"You'll always be Joel to my Spencer," he says softly, resting in his hands on Joel's chest and looking up at his husband through a mess of hair that's gotten so long that it refuses to stay out of his eyes no matter what attempts he makes to change that. He really ought to get it cut, he supposes, but he's not quite willing to give up the way it feels to have Joel's fingers threading through it yet. Maybe when their child starts tugging at it like a playtoy, he'll change his mind but for right now, he's content with every single aspect of his life--something that would seem so unfamiliar if he'd never met Joel.
He takes a step backwards toward the liquor cabinet, lowering his hands to Joel's so he can pull him along, and smiles. "I can't wait to be able to bring the baby here, when he or she is old enough to really appreciate it." The awful memories he has of the library had threatened to overhwelm the good ones for a long while but with Joel's help, Spencer has fought tooth-and-nail not to let that happen. He can be here now without hearing the sound of glass shattering to the ground, without flinching every time someone walks in behind him.
Instead, he thinks of how incredible that first night he'd spent with Joel had been, their legs dangling from the second level as they'd tried to ignore the obvious chemistry between them. He thinks of when Joel had made love to him months later in that same spot, of nights spent sharing glasses of whiskey and reading their books in a comfortable silence, of one of them catching the other staring so fondly before they'd inevitably give in to the mutual desire that always sparks between them and move up to the bedroom.
He wants to make more memories here with their child at their feet. He wants to see the wide-eyed look on his or her face when seeing the shelves of books for that first time, and a quiet sigh escapes him at the thought of curling up with their son or daughter and sharing stories that they both love so much. "We're going to be a family," he murmurs, voice full of wonder as they come to a stop in front of the cabinet. There are tons of people outside wanting to celebrate that very fact with them but in this moment, Spencer is so overcome with this whirlwind of emotions--excitement and fear and anticipation and pure, incomparable joy--that he thinks being alone with Joel is exactly what he'd needed. "A family, Joel, god. It feels like it's been a lifetime since we decided to do this and now it's so close."
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He can't believe how blind he'd been all these years, blind to how utterly beautiful the quiet bookshop owner he'd never said more than a few words to really is, how utterly kind and smart and gentle; but as he's told himself time and time again, they'd met when it was right. The impact of it, of having his life saved in the midst of a Hydra attack of all things, is something he couldn't forget even if he'd tried and everything else that had followed had led them here. Here, in the safest place he knows in spite of what he's seen and what's been done to him, Spencer has never been happier in his entire life.
"You'll always be Joel to my Spencer," he says softly, resting in his hands on Joel's chest and looking up at his husband through a mess of hair that's gotten so long that it refuses to stay out of his eyes no matter what attempts he makes to change that. He really ought to get it cut, he supposes, but he's not quite willing to give up the way it feels to have Joel's fingers threading through it yet. Maybe when their child starts tugging at it like a playtoy, he'll change his mind but for right now, he's content with every single aspect of his life--something that would seem so unfamiliar if he'd never met Joel.
He takes a step backwards toward the liquor cabinet, lowering his hands to Joel's so he can pull him along, and smiles. "I can't wait to be able to bring the baby here, when he or she is old enough to really appreciate it." The awful memories he has of the library had threatened to overhwelm the good ones for a long while but with Joel's help, Spencer has fought tooth-and-nail not to let that happen. He can be here now without hearing the sound of glass shattering to the ground, without flinching every time someone walks in behind him.
Instead, he thinks of how incredible that first night he'd spent with Joel had been, their legs dangling from the second level as they'd tried to ignore the obvious chemistry between them. He thinks of when Joel had made love to him months later in that same spot, of nights spent sharing glasses of whiskey and reading their books in a comfortable silence, of one of them catching the other staring so fondly before they'd inevitably give in to the mutual desire that always sparks between them and move up to the bedroom.
He wants to make more memories here with their child at their feet. He wants to see the wide-eyed look on his or her face when seeing the shelves of books for that first time, and a quiet sigh escapes him at the thought of curling up with their son or daughter and sharing stories that they both love so much. "We're going to be a family," he murmurs, voice full of wonder as they come to a stop in front of the cabinet. There are tons of people outside wanting to celebrate that very fact with them but in this moment, Spencer is so overcome with this whirlwind of emotions--excitement and fear and anticipation and pure, incomparable joy--that he thinks being alone with Joel is exactly what he'd needed. "A family, Joel, god. It feels like it's been a lifetime since we decided to do this and now it's so close."