Joel Waters-Baker (![[personal profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/user.png)
just_another) wrote2015-05-05 07:33 pm
just_another) wrote2015-05-05 07:33 pm
[Open - Gathering - Baby Shower]
They're actually having a baby shower.
Joel is fairly certain his mother wouldn't have let them get away without something, even if he had insisted it be small and consist only of family, but for some reason he and Spencer have allowed themselves to be talked into a real shower. With invitations and food and little baby themed games to play. It's sort of strange, looking at it from his position, given that Erin is the one who's going to be giving birth and therefore is the one in the glowing pregnant woman position at this entire gathering.
She'd sweetly agreed to attend and had even whispered to Joel that she would take the brunt of the attention if she could manage it. He had whispered back that he knew they had picked her for a good reason.
But here they are. Several weeks have passed, the invitations have gone out and the decorations have been put up all over Joel and Spencer's living room. He had agreed to lift the enchantments on the house for the extent of the party, which means that anyone can open the door to their guests, they don't all have to be invited in by either Joel or Spencer, and it makes him a little nervous, but he understands the usefulness of others being able to answer the door. At least for today.
It's the decorations that keep getting to him. Sweet little ducks and zebras and monkeys, little jungle animals all over the walls. The bottle and rattle shaped cookies are pretty cute, but those aren't going to be left when the baby gets here. The animal theme, though, is fairly close to the nearly finished nursery Joel has been working on upstairs and he can't help but grin at the decorations.
Spencer, on the other hand, can't stop coming back round to the center of the living room to stare at the enormous sign that's been strung up above a table already stacked with gifts when a majority of their guests haven't even arrived yet. He'd been worried this morning that the day would overwhelm him, that knowing so many people would be coming into their home would be daunting when just a year ago, he'd never even once invited company over before meeting Joel; but so far, he feels calm, in spite of having had to watch Joel remove the enchantments that act as their security on the house. If someone wishes to crash a baby shower--which he doesn't imagine will happen anyway--then they'll have to face not only the wrath of a room that will be filled with witches and sirens, but the wrath of his mother- and sister-in-law, as well. That's not a sight Spencer thinks would be very pretty to witness.
Still, he feels light, perhaps a lingering effect of the having the chance to fall in love with Joel a second time during the spell that had taken over the town. Certainly, a great deal of his contentment has to do with the fact that he won't have to worry about losing his husband in a crowd but even beyond that, he's excited.
So much has changed in the course of the past year and weeks from now, they'll be holding their newborn in their arms for the very first time without another care in the world but for who they've been looking forward to meeting since they'd decided to take this journey together. There's something a bit strange about realizing that it's all coming to a head, that the waiting will soon be over and they'll be fathers at last, but when the first knock on the door comes, Spencer can't help but smile.
[Baby shower for Joel and Spencer's wee one. Erin, their surrogate, is present and is currently 31 weeks pregnant. If you're even a little friendly with either of them, Joel's mother sent an invitation, but the enchantments have been taken off the house for the event and so it's not an impossible party to crash. If anyone wants to crash a baby shower...]
Joel is fairly certain his mother wouldn't have let them get away without something, even if he had insisted it be small and consist only of family, but for some reason he and Spencer have allowed themselves to be talked into a real shower. With invitations and food and little baby themed games to play. It's sort of strange, looking at it from his position, given that Erin is the one who's going to be giving birth and therefore is the one in the glowing pregnant woman position at this entire gathering.
She'd sweetly agreed to attend and had even whispered to Joel that she would take the brunt of the attention if she could manage it. He had whispered back that he knew they had picked her for a good reason.
But here they are. Several weeks have passed, the invitations have gone out and the decorations have been put up all over Joel and Spencer's living room. He had agreed to lift the enchantments on the house for the extent of the party, which means that anyone can open the door to their guests, they don't all have to be invited in by either Joel or Spencer, and it makes him a little nervous, but he understands the usefulness of others being able to answer the door. At least for today.
It's the decorations that keep getting to him. Sweet little ducks and zebras and monkeys, little jungle animals all over the walls. The bottle and rattle shaped cookies are pretty cute, but those aren't going to be left when the baby gets here. The animal theme, though, is fairly close to the nearly finished nursery Joel has been working on upstairs and he can't help but grin at the decorations.
Spencer, on the other hand, can't stop coming back round to the center of the living room to stare at the enormous sign that's been strung up above a table already stacked with gifts when a majority of their guests haven't even arrived yet. He'd been worried this morning that the day would overwhelm him, that knowing so many people would be coming into their home would be daunting when just a year ago, he'd never even once invited company over before meeting Joel; but so far, he feels calm, in spite of having had to watch Joel remove the enchantments that act as their security on the house. If someone wishes to crash a baby shower--which he doesn't imagine will happen anyway--then they'll have to face not only the wrath of a room that will be filled with witches and sirens, but the wrath of his mother- and sister-in-law, as well. That's not a sight Spencer thinks would be very pretty to witness.
Still, he feels light, perhaps a lingering effect of the having the chance to fall in love with Joel a second time during the spell that had taken over the town. Certainly, a great deal of his contentment has to do with the fact that he won't have to worry about losing his husband in a crowd but even beyond that, he's excited.
So much has changed in the course of the past year and weeks from now, they'll be holding their newborn in their arms for the very first time without another care in the world but for who they've been looking forward to meeting since they'd decided to take this journey together. There's something a bit strange about realizing that it's all coming to a head, that the waiting will soon be over and they'll be fathers at last, but when the first knock on the door comes, Spencer can't help but smile.
[Baby shower for Joel and Spencer's wee one. Erin, their surrogate, is present and is currently 31 weeks pregnant. If you're even a little friendly with either of them, Joel's mother sent an invitation, but the enchantments have been taken off the house for the event and so it's not an impossible party to crash. If anyone wants to crash a baby shower...]
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The sound he makes when Spencer pulls back is a strangled, disappointed noise, and he discovers in that moment the part of his brain responsible for language is gone, too. All he can do is push back with a needy sound, but then he can feel Spencer's finger sliding into him, then he can feel two fingers, and his head drops back down to the desk with a soft thunk. He has his forehead pressed against the wood, his eyes squeezed shut and he's so grateful Spencer isn't paying too much attention to his cock, because he's certain if he were to touch him now, if he were to give a little more focus to stroking him, Joel would completely lose any hope of control within seconds. He's whimpering, trembling, and when he feels tongue in addition to Spencer's fingers, there's a very distinct moment in which Joel thinks his entire vision hast just gone grey and his hands grip the edge of the desk so hard that his knuckles have gone white.
His mouth works, his lips parting, and he thinks he's trying to form words, maybe even trying to say Spencer's name, but he just can't. Nothing comes out but another strangled sound and he finds himself wishing he could see this. He wants to know what they look like, he wants to see Spencer's face buried against his face, and another shuddering moan slides through him, his muscles growing tense as heat licks through his body. Spencer says he looks good and he doesn't even care of it's true because all he wants is to see how Spencer looks. He's willing to bet every last penny to his name that it's an incredible sight, that if he were to see it he would know without a doubt he's never seen anything so beautiful. His husband is perfect in every last way and while Joel knows he wouldn't change a single thing about this moment, not with how incredible he feels right now, he finds himself trying to picture it anyway. Because Spencer is beautiful.
Distantly he's aware of the fact that they're not alone in the house, but he doesn't think it matters much right now. While he's making sounds, while he's the furthest thing from quiet, most of what comes out of him right now is breathless and muted. There's not a chance he's carrying above the music at the moment, not when he can barely think straight enough to make a sound at all, and he presses back toward Spencer's fingers and his mouth, knowing it's only going to get better from here. Knowing soon enough his husband is going to be fucking him, pushing inside of him, making Joel feel like he's finally complete. It's the most right he's ever felt, having Spencer inside him or being the one pressing into Spencer's body. When they curl together, when their arms are around each other, when they're physically connected, that's when Joel feels like he's found the one place in the world he's meant to be, and while their relationship is so much more than just their sex life, he knows it's good that they've found this with each other. They have so much love, a connection he'd never even imagined, and it extends to every last part of their lives.
"Spencer," he finally manages to say, his voice shaking as he speaks. His eyes finally open and he finds he's staring down at the top of the desk, the woodgrain too close for it to be pulled into focus. There's so much going on inside him right now, so much more than he'll ever be able to make sense of, but what everything always boils down to is Spencer. Once again, it's just his husband who can make him feel this way, like every last part of him has been flayed open, spread wide for him. He's vulnerable and he's never been more safe all at once.
Shifting, his spreads his legs a little wider, planting his feet harder against the ground and he's willing to let Spencer do whatever he wants, but he's also willing to let his husband know how good he feels and how much more he wants from him. Everything about him is needy and desperate, the sounds he's making, the position he's put himself in, the way he arches toward Spencer hopefully. There's nothing about him that doesn't make it clear how desperately pleased he is right now and how badly he wants Spencer.
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It isn't that Spencer is dismissive of any of the women Dane had been in relationships with, most of them had been quite lovely, save for the few who hadn't been willing to tolerate Spencer's introverted awkwardness--though now that he thinks about it, those were the relationships that had lasted the shortest amount of time--but for some reason that he still doesn't quite understand, his brother had never seemed particularly keen on settling down with any one of them. Spencer had never seen that as a problem, it matters very little to him whether people get married or start families or don't outside of his own personal life, but he'd always been a bit curious about why Dane would shy away from promising futures. Maybe it'd been seeing Coop back in town after a failed long-term relationship, maybe he'd thought himself too young, maybe he just hadn't wanted it at all; Spencer doesn't know, had never asked, and he regrets that. He regrets not asking more about it, not only because he misses his brother but because he thinks it would only help him to further understand just how he'd come to be so lucky with Joel.
He hadn't been looking for a future, either, after all. Neither of them really had, they'd both been content to stay, respectively, hidden away in the library and the bookshop, out of each other's way and the ways of everyone else in this town; but something had happened nearly a year ago to change all that. Whatever this column of energy is between them, Spencer wonders if it's slowly been building all this time, without their knowledge or understanding of how it works, only to be completed by the time they'd decided to spend the rest of their lives together. No matter what the cause, Spencer knows it's their emotional connection that makes the rest of what they do that much more incredible.
There isn't a single other person in this town, in this world, that he would be happy to do something like this for, get on his knees to fuck his tongue and fingers into someone's ass and prolonging the inevitable just because he likes to hear the sounds he can elicit. This isn't just someone, though, this is Joel. This is his husband, this is the only man--the only person--Spencer has ever loved, ever will love, will ever think to love. That's what makes this so special, and he knows it's different for everyone. He's not so haughty that he'd dare to say that his experience is superior to anyone else's but at the same time... He privately thinks it just might be.
He's seen the looks of envy they get sometimes when they walk down the street, hand-in-hand, looks that they get even from their own friends once in awhile. There's no doubt in his mind that the small social circle they keep would be scandalized to hear what goes on between them in their sex life, and that's satisfying somehow because Spencer knows what people think of him. If he's not a murderer, he's just the former librarian. He's the co-owner of a bookstore, a husband, a man who likes to keep to himself and to his family. But Joel has made him so much more than that. It's Joel who'd inspired him to find porn online, to say the kinds of things he'd never said to anyone else, to do this when the last person he'd had sex with would likely describe him as unskilled and unbearably boring.
All the exciting parts of his life, he owes to Joel, and it's easy to remember that when he's slipping a third finger into his husband, tonguing and fingering him for another agonizing couple of minutes while Joel rocks his hips back, searching for more, begging for more. It isn't until Spencer feels like he might just come in his pants with the arousal of watching Joel move and hearing Joel moan that he finally gives in. He cautiously pulls his fingers free before rushing to get to his feet so he can undo his pants, pushing them down past his ankles along with his briefs before reaching for the lube so he can slick himself well enough to ensure that he doesn't cause his husband any unnecessary pain.
"I can't wait to be inside you," he murmurs, his voice low and husky as he steps forward to align his cock with Joel's ass. Spencer leans forward, one hand trailing down his husband's spine as he presses kisses across the length of his shoulders, licking a line up the upper part of Joel's spine as his fingers brush down over his ass until he's gripping his own cock. He pauses for a moment, just to admire how utterly gorgeous Joel looks like this, bent over for him with his legs spread, and Spencer wishes that he could be watching his husband's expressions change because that's one of the things that he loves the most when they're making love. Still, he thinks as he gingerly guides his cock inside of his husband, this is incredible, too. Noticing the occasional ripple of muscle in Joel's shoulders, the shudders and trembling, knowing that right now, he's in control without the slightest desire to control... It all feels so unspeakably good.
"Joel," he groans as he presses deeper into Joel, deeper until he bottoms out, and Spencer drops his chin until his forehead is touching his husband's shoulder. His body is stiff from trying not to come right then and there, from how utterly tight Joel is, how it feels to have that ring of muscle moving around his cock, and he's drunk with love and arousal and a little bit of whiskey as he lets out a shaky moan before pulling halfway out and thrusting back into his husband's body.
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Before their first time, Joel has done his own research. He had watched some videos, but mostly he had read articles and he remembers now reading something about the outpouring of emotion that can come with a truly exceptional connection. He knows what he has with Spencer is out of the ordinary, he knows he's simply the luckiest person in this entire town, but every single time he's felt himself getting emotional during sex, it's always leaned toward tears. Tears of happiness, of course, but tears all the same and now here he is, so unable to contain the joy and pleasure he's feeling that his body is shaking with laughter. He turns his head just a little, enough that he can see Spencer because he doesn't want his husband to think he's laughing at him. It's probably not the sort of thing he has to worry about, not when Spencer understands him more fully than any other person ever has, but he needs it to be clear. He needs Spencer to understand just how happy he really is in this moment.
And it's as Spencer is rubbing his cock against Joel's ass, it's only as he slowly starts to press inside that the laughter gives way to something else, a dark sort of gasp as he presses back. Ever since Spencer undressed him, Joel has felt like he's lost the ability to speak and it suddenly all comes back to him in a flood. Nothing will communicate what he's feeling right now, no words can possibly capture just how happy he is, how good he feels, how much he knows he owes that all to Spencer, but he feels like he has to say something. The words aren't always important, but right now it feels like they are. Right now he knows something needs to be said and there is just one thing he can come up with that he knows will say what he means.
"I love you, Spencer," he breathes, turning his head so his forehead is resting against the desk once more. There's a shiver going through him, his muscles tightening as Spencer touches him and slowly starts to fuck him. It doesn't hurt, not even for a moment, not after all the preparation Spencer had done. Any pain is gone as soon as he feels it and he presses back hopefully, desperately, needing even more, needing to please his husband as completely as he can. Spencer has been more than taking care of him this evening and Joel knows there's only so much he can do in return in this position, but he knows he can make it clear that he feels incredible. He knows he can respond to Spencer's thrusts with enthusiasm and he knows he doesn't need to be loud to do that.
"I love you so much," he says, his breath rushing out of him as Spencer drives into him a little harder. "You have no idea what you do to me. You undo me, Spencer. You make it so I can't see anything but you." And he never wants that to change. Until the very last breath he takes, Spencer is going to be the only one he sees, the only one who knows what it's like to have Joel in such a position. He's the only person who'll know what it looks like when Joel is truly happy, when he's sad, when he's so turned on that he can't see straight. He doesn't think of himself as an exceptional man by any means, but he knows Spencer loves him and this is really the greatest gift Joel can give him. The most meaningful. Spencer has every last part of him, knows all his secrets, all his dreams. Spencer has everything.
As he arches back, as he finds Spencer's rhythm and presses back toward his cock, gasping and whispering his husband's name, he knows it goes further than that, too. Spencer has everything, but he is everything, too.
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As he drives himself deeper, Spencer has to bite down hard on his lip to keep himself from choking out the sob building in his throat, the one that exists because of the incredible things his husband is saying to him. Joel doesn't often speak this much when they're having sex, they both know the words aren't necessary because they'll always love each other, they'll always know without a doubt that their hearts and bodies and souls are only for each other, they'll always share so many things that nobody else in this world will ever know about or understand because it's just for them, so much of their lives are just for them; but to hear this outburst of verbal emotion from Joel affects him more than Spencer could ever hope to express.
He can't see Joel's face but hearing his voice helps keep him grounded, and he reaches around Joel's waist to take his cock in hand as he murmurs softly into his ear, "I love you, baby, I love you so much. Every single day with every last piece of me, I'll always love you." He alternates thrusts and strokes, wanting Joel to feel incredible during each second of their intimacy, and he briefly thinks that they likely wouldn't even have needed the music because there's something so intense about this time in particular that neither of them seem to be able to be doing much more than gasp. The rhythm they've developed has been steady, a perfect pace that isn't too fast or too slow, but now he squeezes Joel's ass with his free hand, straightening up, letting his husband's cock slip free of his hand so he can grip Joel's waist, and thrusting harder into him, as deeply as he can manage, the sound of skin against skin echoing off the walls of the library.
Spencer had never felt so physically good in his life, of that he's certain. He watches with parted lips as he eases his cock nearly all the way out of Joel's ass before slamming into him again, a choked sob escaping him as he feels that familiar hear forming in his belly, the one that tells him just how close to losing himself he really is, but it's not himself that he's concerned about. He'd made promises for how this is going to end, and he's going to keep them. He quickens his pace, the force behind his thrusts still just as strong as he brings his hand down hard on Joel's ass, the sound of the smack loud enough to sound suspect from outside the room, but it doesn't matter. His fingers brush gently over the reddening skin on Joel's cheek, and he lets out a low moan.
"Fucking hell," he says, the words coming out in a near growl, "I'm going to come, baby, I'm going to-- god, you feel so perfect, you're so tight and perfect, I--" A deep shudder runs through him then, a sharp tingle rushing down his spine, and he can't help it, he's coming so suddenly that it nearly knocks him off his feet. Joel's muscles are clenched so tightly around him, and he doesn't want this to end but at the same time, he knows how incredible it will be to look up at watch Joel's face as he comes.
He falls back to his knees once he's pulled out, his cock still so hard and sensitive, and groans as he leans forward to spread Joel's ass. "Tell me, Joel," he says, gasping for breath that just won't catch, you have to tell me when. I need to see you when you-- I need to see you, I need to taste you." He leans forward then to press his tongue back into his husband's ass, pushing it in and out, feeling a bit like he might have gone out of his mind as the taste of his own come hits him.
He'd wanted to make this evening unforgettable for both of them, to debauch Joel thoroughly, and Spencer thinks that by the time they're through, they'll be able to agree that he's done a rather good job of it.
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And just when he thinks he can't possibly feel any better than he does now, Spencer is pulling out of him and pressing his tongue back into his ass and the only thing Joel can think of is that he has to be able to taste himself. If not for the desk under him, he would collapse right on the floor at the thought and it sends a bolt of heat straight through his body, down his spine and into his cock. There's nothing in the world he could ever imagine even half as incredible as his own husband and the sound he makes, his cheek pressed hard against the desk, is awfully close to a sob. His eyes are squeezed shut tight, he can feel the cool wood of the desk against his skin and his fingers curl over the edge, his knuckles white with pressure. Spencer has just fucked him, come inside him, and is fucking him with his tongue again, and Joel's entire body shakes with pleasure and joy alike. He wants to never share this with anyone, he wants to keep this to himself and yet there's a small part of him that wants to brag, that wants to tell everyone they're never going to have this because they're never going to have Spencer.
This is his. Every last part of this is his. It's theirs and that makes it so much more important and special than anything else he's ever been able to imagine for his life.
He's doing his best to keep his sounds to the bare minimum, only because they're not alone in the house, and he thinks they'd gotten fairly good at it during their time living with Raleigh. They've had practice, but they've also been on their own for a long enough time now that he's already adjusted to their new level of privacy and it's a struggle now not to cry out. Especially given how good Spencer is making him feel. His hands tighten on the desk and he bites down hard on his lower lip, hard enough that he can feel the indentation his teeth have left behind when he soothes his tongue over it a second later. He feels like he's losing his mind, though only in the best possible way, and another deep shudder runs through his body as Spencer fucks him, sweeps his tongue over his ass and then presses inside him again.
"Spencer, god, I'm..." He's supposed to tell him when he's going to come, he knows what Spencer wants to do and he wants to be able to tell him, but for a second it feels like he's completely lost the ability to speak all over again. His fingers are tingling, his hands and feet feel a little like they're going to go numb. All the blood has rushed to other areas of his body, his cock harder than he thinks it's ever been, his cheeks red from exertion and pleasure, and he digs his heels into the floor a little harder. "Holy shit, Spencer, I'm going to come, please, you... please." He knows what Spencer wants and he's doing his best to hold on longer for him, to make it last. It's a struggle, though, and Spencer is going to have to stop if he wants to be able to make this last much longer at all.
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If he could have it his way, he'd keep this going all night, for as long as he's able, and maybe it's a bit perverse that he would want such a thing when he has two in-law family members cleaning up after a party thrown in their honor on the other side of this wall, but Spencer cares about absolutely nothing other than making sure that his husband feels incredible. There's something he likes about hearing Joel beg like that, actually pleading with Spencer as if he'd ever deny Joel anything he wants, and even though it's true that he'd be content to do this--fall to his knees and fuck his husband with his tongue--until sunrise, he also knows that the alternative will be just as satisfying for both of them.
It's with another few thrusts of his tongue that he pulls out again, biting down hard on the inside of his cheek to keep from moaning as loudly as he wants to as he runs his hands over Joel's ass, taking half a moment to admire the back half of his husband before he's wrapping his fingers over Joel's hips, urging him to let go of the desk and turned around to face him. At the sight of Joel's cock, Spencer thinks it's entirely possibly that he could get hard again. For someone who hasn't had much of a libido to speak of at all in the years before he and Joel had started seeing each other, it sometimes comes as a shock to think that this time last year, he hadn't even been thinking about having sex. Their physical relationship is more than anything Spencer could have hoped for, especially because he's never hoped for anything at all, but he doesn't think he ever could have anticipated this.
Before Joel, he doesn't think he would imagined putting his tongue anywhere near another person's ass, but having Joel love and trust him enough to do for him had only ever made Spencer want to return the favor--and he hasn't been disappointed. The way Joel had squirmed under his hands, the gasps that had come at a well-placed swipe of his tongue, Spencer could thrive on that for hours on end. So much of his life can be divided into two categories, Before Joel and After Joel, but there's little to nothing about Before--barring his relationship with his family-that Spencer thinks had been better. With Joel has come a refreshed outlook on life, and he isn't the social butterfly Dane or their mother had been even now but Joel has never asked to be. Joel would never ask that of him, to be something he isn't, and Spencer feels a surge of love inside of him that brings him back to the matter at hand.
"I won't hold back," he promises, wetting his lips and keeping his eyes trained on Joel's as he leans forward to take Joel's cock on his mouth. He means what he's said, he doesn't want to prolong this because he's already been allowed to come himself, and this isn't about orgasm denial in the slightest. It's about making sure that Joel knows that he's willing to do anything to make him feel good, that he's always going to want to give all of himself to make Joel feel good, and Spencer wraps his hand around the base of his husband's shaft as he sucks hard at the tip, moaning at that familiar saltiness of the pre-come coating Joel's cock.
He isn't slow about guiding Joel's cock deeper down in throat, lowering his hand to cup his husband's balls so he can massage them as he works his tongue over him, not bothering to try to hide juts how eager he is to please. He quickens his pace, taking Joel deeper with every bob of his hand until his gag reflex nearly kicks in but even then, it barely affects him through the haze of arousal that's clouding his mind. If this is even half as good for Joel as it is for him, Spencer will consider this a success.
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There's absolutely no hope of him being able to keep control over himself, not with Spencer touching him like he is. He's supporting his weight on the desk again, his fingers curled over the edge, holding on as tight as he possibly can. His feet are planted firmly against the floor, his knees locked, because he knows if he lets his muscles relax, he knows if he lets his joints unhinge he's just going to collapse on the floor in a heap. He never feels as good as he does when Spencer is touching him and he gasps, his gaze darting from the wall, to the ceiling, then down to where Spencer's lips are stretched around his cock. Somehow he manages to uncurl one hand from the edge of his desk and he buries his shaking fingers in Spencer's hair. His muscles don't seem to be obeying him, he doesn't think he could thrust deeper into Spencer's mouth if he tried, but he doesn't need to. His husband is doing everything exactly as Joel loves it and he groans again, something that might be Spencer's name falling from his lip as he stares down at him. The thought comes to him again out of nowhere how much he loves this, how much he loves to just look at Spencer like this, how good he feels because no one has ever loved him the way Spencer does. No one has ever touched him like this, taken care of him, gone so far out of their way to make him feel good, and he gives a choked off sob as Spencer manages to somehow take him deeper still and for a second the edges of his vision begin to go grey.
He feels like he's been on the verge of coming forever now and his hips twitch forward once before his breath catches in his throat and then it's suddenly coming upon him without the slightest warning. There are words, a warning, he wants to tell Spencer to expect it, but it just happens, the warm wave of pleasure washing over him as his hand tightens in Spencer's hair. "Oh... god," he manages in a choked off moan as another bolt of pleasure goes through him and for a second he's worried his knees might just let go despite his best efforts. He manages to hold himself up, his eyes squeezed shut tight, his head tipped back as he comes, as he feels Spencer's mouth and tongue still working around him, and he's shivering with exertion now, practically trembling with it as he groans and pants and tries to say Spencer's name, but his ability to make words still doesn't extend quite that far.
The hand on the desk is gripping it so tight that his fingers hurt, but he only notices after a few moments of trying to catch his breath and when he releases the grip he has on the edge all his knuckles crack. Somehow he manages a laugh, a breathless, wrung out sound, and then his head tips forward so he can look down at Spencer still on his knees on the floor. His fingers loosen in his hair, brush it back from his face, rub lightly against his scalp as he tries to convey with just a touch how much he loves his husband. Words are still beyond him and he laughs again and shakes his head, then realizes he's about to collapse, no matter how badly he wants to remain standing. His knees just sort of let go and Joel shivers again, then lets himself slide down the surface of the desk until he's sitting on the floor, his legs on either side of Spencer's body.
Reaching for his husband, he runs both his hands through Spencer's hair. They're shaking, he's shaking all over, but he's smiling at the same time and he still can't quite speak, but he thinks when he kisses Spencer it communicates what he's feeling well enough. Just how happy he is, how good he feels, and how much, how deeply and desperately he loves him.