(open - tw: violence)
Oct. 14th, 2014 09:43 pmIt's not the first dream he's had, but it's the first one he remembers in such great detail.
( Cut for violent imagery )
He wakes up with his heart pounding and a scream in his throat, but it never quite manages to catch hold. It's four in the morning, but Joel lies in bed beside Spencer, staring up at the ceiling until the sun comes up and then he puts on a smile and goes about his day like any other. But the dream lingers. It hangs on and it leaves him feeling deeply unsettled, even as he kisses Spencer goodbye and tells him to take the morning off.
Joel desperately wants to be with him, he needs to be touching Spencer just to remind himself that it was only a dream, he'd never actually hurt anyone he loves, but he needs the time alone, too. He has to do some kind of research, he has to figure out what's happening because something is happening. He can't pretend anymore. Something is very wrong.
As he opens the store, he finds himself thinking of Nerium and wishing he had some way to contact her. She would know, he thinks, or she'd have an idea. She would be able to help him and he wonders if he thinks hard enough about her that she'll know he needs her. She always seems to know.
It's only once he's inside the store that he allows himself a moment. Standing against the door in the dark, Joel closes his eyes and he sees those awful things again. The people he loves most in the world hurt at his hands and he wonders who else he's dreamed off. There are strange, confusing memories of other dreams and he thinks he should be thankful he can't remember all the details.
But he opens his eyes and then he opens the store and he goes about his day, but between customers, he drags out a book on dark spirits and demons, reading every last bit of information he can.
This isn't happening to him. It isn't.
[Joel's demon is getting louder. >:D Come visit the bookstore!]
( Cut for violent imagery )
He wakes up with his heart pounding and a scream in his throat, but it never quite manages to catch hold. It's four in the morning, but Joel lies in bed beside Spencer, staring up at the ceiling until the sun comes up and then he puts on a smile and goes about his day like any other. But the dream lingers. It hangs on and it leaves him feeling deeply unsettled, even as he kisses Spencer goodbye and tells him to take the morning off.
Joel desperately wants to be with him, he needs to be touching Spencer just to remind himself that it was only a dream, he'd never actually hurt anyone he loves, but he needs the time alone, too. He has to do some kind of research, he has to figure out what's happening because something is happening. He can't pretend anymore. Something is very wrong.
As he opens the store, he finds himself thinking of Nerium and wishing he had some way to contact her. She would know, he thinks, or she'd have an idea. She would be able to help him and he wonders if he thinks hard enough about her that she'll know he needs her. She always seems to know.
It's only once he's inside the store that he allows himself a moment. Standing against the door in the dark, Joel closes his eyes and he sees those awful things again. The people he loves most in the world hurt at his hands and he wonders who else he's dreamed off. There are strange, confusing memories of other dreams and he thinks he should be thankful he can't remember all the details.
But he opens his eyes and then he opens the store and he goes about his day, but between customers, he drags out a book on dark spirits and demons, reading every last bit of information he can.
This isn't happening to him. It isn't.
[Joel's demon is getting louder. >:D Come visit the bookstore!]